Expectation

i have been busy lately so couldn't write from sometime.

So expectation, well, there are 2 types of expectation:

1: expecting some result of the work which u have done..

2: expecting someone to do something for u

Expecting a result solely depends on the hard work and presence of mind, u have applied while completing that work and on top of that, how successful u were in implementing ur plans for completing the said work..

Expecting someone to do something for u or rather expecting someone to be with u or so many cases like this, which involves someone's presence.. someone from whom u r expecting a certain thing.

Whom do u expect from? well the answer is simple, u expect from everyone.. eg. u expect ur enemy to try and harm u, u expect a beggar to ask money from u and so on..

But what matter the most is expectation from ur loved ones..

When u do something, it is always said, never expect anything in return, well i too as well say so.. and try to imply the same in my life, but somewhere down the line, i m not GOD. i need help as well, i need caring and i need love. so this leads me to expect someone to depend on... someone whom i helped, loved and cared.. this feeling cant be ignored.. when u love someone, u cant love them forever, if they dont love u back..

But usually this expectation are broken, i have personally found myself in many situation, where, i need someone and no one was there, and all i kept on thinking was, did i do the same to anyone? y isnt there anyone at the moment when i need them? haven't i helped anyone? and suddenly from no where this question makes me angry and to be precise, it makes me sad.. and its the case with everyone..

People tell me they care for me, they love me but again the same people tell me, u cant expect this, u cant expect that.. well i cant understand, y cant i expect the same things which u expect from me? i try to not be selfish and live up to expectation, but when i see no one to live up to mine, it hurts and it hurts real bad..

i want to say something to some people, but i really cant tell it on their face, i really dont want to hurt them, i would always love everyone, the place for hatred in my heart is negligible, i accept, i have hatred in me, but if i hate someone, its for a big reason.. when i promise to love everyone being unselfish, cant u please be there for me, if not at everytimes, but atleast at sometimes..

If not all this, atleast dont say it on my face, "Dude, u cant expect this from me". it drives me nuts, i makes me hate myself and at time, it makes me hate the quality in me to go out of my limits to live up to expectation..

Nothing can work alone, no single person can get everything, the success is always shared, so ofcourse, it has expectations from many people.. and when these expectation are filled up.. they make the entire contributor successful

At many times, just your presence may help someone, so if cant help someone atleast be there by their side. it gives them courage and anonymous strength to move ahead..

Spread the love, not hatred.. coz finally what u need is simple cloth, shelter and bread..

Hiding feelings..

Guys remember, when we were kids, we used to play, HIDE AND SEEK, which is on average the most popular game in kids and it was sure fun..

As soon as we grow, we usually stop playing that game and then we start another one.. thats HIDE AND SEEK EMOTION version.. People start hiding their feelings for someone.. and at times, they hide it from themselves..

This usually happens, when u fall in love or when u know, ur feelings towards someone close might end up loosing them.. but have u realised, if the person whom u share the feeling, is he/she feels the same, and u both hide just to be on a safer side, it wont work at all.. even thou u have the same feelings, nothing works out as it should and after sometime, someday, u think that it was ur foolishness to have that kind of feeling for that person as that person doesnt has the same feelings for u without knowing about the latter one..

once i have been into such situation, well i guess everyone comes to this situation atleast once in the lifetime, u may be able to say anything and everything to everyone.. but just one thing to one person cannot be expressed.. Well i waited for long to tell the person how i feel for them.. it dint turn out the way i expected, but then atleast i then started to get over that feeling for that person and i guess it is how it should work..

If u dont speak up about ur feelings, u cant explain it other ways.. and wait till the other person realises it, trust me, most of the times, it wont happen, even if it happens, other person is not 100% sure so he/she also will not tell them about their's whatever it may be.. and it takes too long to get to a conclusion.. and if the conclusion which arrives is positive, then its good but if it's not positive.. u realise, u are too deep in this feeling and getting over is practically very tough..

If u speak up, ya ofcourse not when u have doubts in your own mind, u get a reply, no matter what is the reply, u r happy.. if its positive, ofcourse u r happy and then u have more time to share that feeling with that person and when it turns out to be negative.. u just feel bad for a day or 2 but then u r not deep into it so as to take long to get over it.. u get over it very soon and then it is also good, coz there isnt anything in ur heart to speak..

when u dont express ur feeling or what's in ur mind to the person concerned, u will always have that same thing in ur mind and in this competitive world, ur mind has to be fresh for everything.. new thoughts every min. mind should be innovative, but when ur mind is pre-occupied with something, how could u possibly have something productive in mind?

The reply NO is always heart breaking, but then it depends on u, how u take it.. and how well u handle it.. so as far as i know, u should express ur feelings.. but always keep in mind, when u have expressed ur feelings, do not let the person feel that u got hurt coz of it.. the person may not have the same feeling for u but the person might be caring for u a lot and it would hurt them as well..

NO relationship is better than SORE relationship..

HIDING IS GOOD FOR TREASURE, NOT FOR FEELINGS..

confusion

confusion: its again a state of mind when u cant decide, it is one of the factor which shows how confident u r..

well i have a friend of mine, everything u ask her, she will reply, i dont know.. havent thought about it yet.. everything u tell her and she is confused..

well confusion is something, if u think about, will confuse u a lot..

When i think about confusion, what i think is, it may be either of 2 cases, 1st: when u have to choose between 2 things which are of equal importance/which gives equal happiness.. or 2nd: when u have to choose between 2 worst things or scenario..

i have read once somewhere: when u r confused between 2 things, just toss the coin, not coz it will give u a result but as soon as u toss it, hear the very first thing ur heart wants from coin.. and thats what u really want and ur confusion gets over.. i havent been into many confusing situations in recent times, but whenever i have been, i have been thru extreme situations and they were vital..

When u r confused and when u know it, ur mind tends to be stressed, thus working slower and not letting u come to a decision.. When u r really really confused and nothing is coming in ur mind, toss the coin.. well if ur heart says something, then good but if it doesnt dont go with the result, coin has given.. ask someone about it.. someone who doesnt know about that thing related to u at all.. it gives u a neutral decision..

Well there is one more type of confusion, i guess, its toughest to handle and the biggest confusing one.. BRAIN v/s HEART. it is usually found when someone is in love.. gals (on an average, considering girls to be more emotional than guys) usually get biased towards heart and guys are biased towards brain.. Girls usually endup usually thinking, i know u r wrong but then i dont want to loose u so i will just cover it up with my love.. and guys endup thinking, i love u, but that doesnt mean, u r not wrong..

when u r in confused in love, dont think about it at all.... ask someone else.. take more than 1 decision u want.. but dont think urself.. coz somewhere or the other, love makes u biased and the decision u take may end up being a wrong 1. even for that matter, guys who tend to use their brain and try to be hard not to think with their heart, but after sometime, they start doing it.. and get biased...

i have written a poem, which is basically about a girl who is confused, after she recieves a proposal, she isnt sure of saying yes or no, she loves him, but she is afraid to loose him someday..

THE SMILING TEARS

I could see tears rolling down the eyes

but with a smile on her face…

I really don’t know what to rely on…

This confusion makes me feel disgrace….

Every drop of the tears shows the pain inside her soul

Every inch of the smile resembles happiness of my doll…

She is confused so as to laugh or to cry,

Even I am crying but my eyes are dry..

There is a simple answer to the question

She do loves me but with regression…

Answer is so simple as it could be ,

Even if she wants she cant be with me..

I wish someday she would conclude her decision,

Till that time, as everyone says,I will have to have the patience…

-----------------ends----------------------------------

Well so confusion, aint bad, aint good, it depends on what's at the stake, sometime, the person regarding whom u r confused, feels great coz u r confused coz of them, like the guy here in the poem is happy, whatever may be the answer, he knows that the girl loves him, what more does he needs?

its all about ur perception on things.. confusion doesnt last long, if u think it with an unbiased mind or if u take someone's help...

confidence

Confidence: one more important thing to succeed in life.. no one can do anything without it..

Confidence: Believing urself..

I still remember, when i was small, i.e will i was in school. i was very under-confident.. i was never a bad student.. not a very good student either.. but when i see look behind, i see, i could have done better..

Now, i m a confident guy, no matter what happens, when i do something, i have that confidence in me, that i can do it.. many people say, i m over confident and optimistic about things happening the right way.. what i say is, if i dont have that confidence, i wont be able to give it my full efforts.. and thus, the chances of success will diminish.. and that wont be good anyways..

The best part of having confidence is the way u talk changes, the under confident guy can never convince someone for anything.. he can never give his full efforts, back in his mind, the chances of failure increases every minute... and in a confident guy, its all opposite, he can convince anyone coz he is sure of things and that makes him confident.. the words which he uses is powerful.. he gives all his effort, coz the confidence in him tells him, he will win.. and thus it creates a positive energy in him and it gives him better ideas to deal with things.. he is open to experiments.. which under confident guy would never..

People usually say, being confident is nice but u have to be practical.. i m not sure, what do they mean by it.. so if everyone has failed, practically speaking, i should as well fail right? but it isnt the case, the person who is confident enough, practical things doesnt matters.. they create their own path...

A couple of lines from my scribblings:

I wish life had been so easy, as "so called practical" people say.. Then there wouldn't have been any prey.. i don't deny your theory about life, but i have my own.. u say, there is a road to destination, but i say, i want to make it one for my own..

Being confident works most of the time, it gives u courage to fight.. now saying all this, everyone should be confident.. but it isnt easy to build confidence..

U really need to believe that u r right, u will face many problems.. usually questions comes in the way for confidence.. usually u think, no, its tuff i may not be able to do it.. u cant get that confidence..

I just received a sms today, it was "its so hard when you HAVE TO and so easy when u WANT TO" i completely agree with it.. its all about mindset.. u have the correct mindset, everything is possible.. and to have this mindset, u should believe urself and have confidence in urself..

Remember, Confident person may fail at times, but he is sure, he did all he could to achieve his goal and so he knows, next time, what extra effort he has to put in for the same... but an Under confident guy would fail in most of the cases, and in the cases which he will succeed, he wont be sure of things... and where he fails, he gives up..

ONCE U GIVE UP ON SOMETHING, U HAVE LOST IT COMPLETELY...

well saying about all this, remember there is a very thin line between confidence and over confidence.. make sure, when u r confident and specially when u taste success in succession.. don't let that confidence turn into over confidence.. Only confidence doesnt help, u have to put in the efforts to achieve goals.. confidence just gives u a proper mindset and positive energy to work on ur goals..

Trust

yet another very important part of life.. what very imp.. its probably the most imp thing in life...

Well again ask urself, how many people in this lifetime u have trusted... and how many broke it, and then really think deep and ask urself how many trusts u have broken, its hard for anyone to accept that we, ourself haven't broken anyone's trust.. but believe me, no one, i mean no one practically hasn't broken any1's trust...

So now, saying that everyone breaks the trust, even i have done it at times.. maybe for the good reasons i may say, but then it was breaking trust.. anyways i tried keeping all my promises, and touchwood, people trust me.. and that makes me real happy..

Trust: This is one thing, which makes or breaks relationships.. if u trust someone, u will always be together, if u dont, no matter how much u think, u r in love with, u would loose him/her someday.. and this is not just for ur bf/gf but it holds true for everyone.. a friend, parents, sibling, .... and everyone..

trust makes a mindset that the person in front of u is right and u believe it.. no matter what happens, if u trust him/her, u would agree with the things he/she says to do.. or anything which they are doing on behalf of u..

e.g: U go the dr. u take medicine and eat it and in a course of time, u are well again.. here, u trust the dr. knows about the desease and the medicines he has prescribed is going to work and u will get welll.. its a mindset that helps major part to cure not the medicine.. mindset comes from the trust... and almost everyone has a family dr. u say that his medicines suits u.. well the dr. has studied in the same college, where many other dr. have studied and have almost the same experience and knows almost the same things and probably will describe the same medicine or a similar one.. so y do u choose a family dr. thats coz after a couple of time of his medicines, u got well and u started trusting him... so trust factor comes again...

Trust doesnt comes easily for everyone, i know many people who find it hard to trust anyone.. and saying in a way its good.. but then, when u dont trust anyone, how do u expect others to trust u? and when there is no trust... even a friendship cant exist.. so u will be all alone..

I trust easily, well in past, i had bad experiences but many good as well.. so its how the other person is and how close u get and how much u trust someone..

at times, i have noticed that breaking the trust is important, well usually these are minor cases and this is usually for good reasons of ur loved ones..

keep one person in this world, who u can blindly trust, coz if u cant trust anyone blindly, u wont share all the things with anyone and some part of ur life will be unsolved mystery and there are many times, u want to say things to others, but u cant trust them to an extent to disclose them n u endup keeping it to urself thus increasing mental pressure and more are the chances of getting depressed.

with trust, comes the thing which u call belief. they are the same thing, i trust someone so i believe him/her as well, and there are times, but u are not sure, if u cant trust the person but then u still believe them on basis of facts..

when u believe someone, u automatically trust him/her with atleast that perticular thing or work.. but there are times, when u trust someone but u dont believe his/her capacity to do things.. in that case, u kind of trust but dont believe a person at a same time..

All in all, start trusting people.. not saying blindly trust them, take ur time, but if someone is trying to win ur trust, let them do it.. coz for many, ur trust is more than he/she wants from u.. and these people usually love u the most... and would things for u which u wont even imagine.. just to see u happy and just to keep that trust...

Even if u break trust of many people, u may not feel guilty about it.. but if u break the trust of a person who blindly trusts u or a person who unconditionally be there with u for ur trust and love.. u would feel the guilt which is more painful then death.. and the other person will be shattered and many a times, that person wont trust anyone anymore..

so please, do not break trust, tell the person about the fact, at times, facts are painful but its less painful than a heart break or betrayal..

anger and irritation

I haven't written 2 topics together anytime in one post, but i guess its necessary to write these two in one.. coz they are directly related to each other...

If a person is angry, tell him/her anything, he/she will get irritated for sure.. and vice-versa...

Wow, this is one of the topics, i would really like to talk about.. I wont ask u to question urself, whats anger, coz for everyone i guess its the same and if u dont think likewise u r free to think, what's anger for u...

My friends say, i get angry real fast, i dont know, is there any time limit before which u cant get angry.. i mean thats stupidity, the threshold when u get angry depends on how much r u hurt.. and ya maybe i get hurt fast.. maybe..

anger: since birth, i have heard that its not a good thing, i mean y? its just an emotion, as others are so whats bad in it? Anger at all times, shows how much u love and care.. think of the situations in past, y were u angry? Mostly i guess in 2 cases, once when someone is wrong and its harming u or when someone close to urself is harmed or hurt. Irritation is surely bad, no doubts about it..

Have u realised anytime, when ur anger is due to first case, it just wents off very fast, i mean, i have noticed it... it goes away very soon.. but when u r angry coz ur close one is harmed, u generally dont loose it so fast. Imagine 2 situation... 1. Someone is abusing u.. 2. someone is abusing ur younger sibling who cant help but to listen... which case would make u more angry, for me it will be the second case.

Talking about irritation, well continuing with the above example. That moment, even if ur sibling says anything, u would probably get irritated and more angry, even thou u care for him/her, but u get irritated... leave about the person abusing, if he/she says something more... u would be so irritated, u would loose the last bit of ur wit..

Irritation: one thing which we come across many a times, there are more things which irritate u than to anger u.. irritation takes place when ur mind doesnt allows u to understand the things happening around u and stop giving u actions to take in the situation... everything u hear has a negative meaning.. nothing is positive and believe me, after u have crossed that phase of irritation, u would realise, the things told to u while u were irritated where just to calm u down and were mostly correct.. this again happens coz loss of wit for a while...

ya sorry, dint tell u about the wit... how many times, have u regretted a fight or a cold war.. i have regretted it almost everytime, coz while one gets angry, they lose their wit and same is the case with irritation.. to be more precise, only coz u loose ur wit, ur thinking power, anytime u get angry, u start getting irritated... and vice-versa..

I had told u that anger isnt bad thing, i will tell u how... its just an emotion and it comes from inside... if u can control it, there are many things u will achieve which u havent even thought of..

i have told u, u loose ur wit when u r angry, believe me, if u can manage to understand things around u and not loose ur mind.. u will be benefited from the anger..

not possible? think again...

i m angry on someone, i just go and bash him, what's my benefit? what did i get? he lost something, he probably got a wound and highly possible, me too, but in any case, i didnt gain anything..

now if i keep my cool, i understand the situation around me, the anger in me, will tell me to show him that i m superior.. and only coz its my mind working rather than my hands... i would think of smarter things to do.. probably if we are in a competition, his anger towards me will make him aggressive and aggressive person plays well but not for long.. and then that's the time, i can get success over him.. thus my anger helped me to even defeat him/her and also i m benefit from it..

anyone's lose is not ur success.. everytime we think, if the opponent lost, we won, thats wrong, coz u dint win coz of extra hard work, u won coz the person in front wasnt giving enough hard work towards it.. highly possible, he/she will fire back with stronger strategy and harder work.. and then u would loose...

so make it a point, dont reply on someone's weakness, make urself strong... someone's weakness can make u win again him/her but ur strongness would help u against everyone..

Even thou i said, anger isnt bad, i m as well not saying, anger is good.. it has lot bad effects than good effects...

whatever the situation is.. keep ur calm, everytime u r angry, say in ur mind, "u r losing ur brain, u will get irritated, dont let this happen.. calm down" at one point after little efforts u will realise, anger would be now at fewer moments and irritation still fewer...

Have a happy life, stay calm, love everyone... tc

Happiness

Well, said many things about sadness, it was right from beginning.. now its happiness turn, well before i start, just want to tell u, i have promised, 2 of my best friends that i will be happy as much as possible and guess what, the days have been pretty much better than recent past and i m really happy.. a big thanks to that anonymous girl thou..

so again as usual, a question.. whats happiness?

and second question:

Whats happiness to u.. well i have heard the same question in a movie named: Vanilla sky, and that was the time, when i seriously thought about it..

SO happiness: well its a one thing everyone does everything for.. i mean, u work to earn, u earn so that u get everything u want, and that would make u happy, in short u work for happiness and more things like this..

Happiness means different things to different people.. for me, happiness is when people whom i love are happy.. their smile makes me happy, no matter how sad i am, but if see someone smiling, i m happy and for some happiness is when they are independent and free.. and many different things

happiness is resembled by smile on the face but if u ask me, the truest happiness brings tears in the eyes.. these tears are different... u dont feel bad looking at them, but u feel happy.. i have seen that many a times.. specially with the people who never cry in front of others..

well we want to be happy, but have u ever thought, do u deserve happiness? anyone who is selfish, can be happy but not for long.. someday he will realise that he isnt happy anymore.. only coz there would be no one to share his happiness...

again the same point as it was in sadness, just to recollect.. when u r sad, u feel u r alone, but the time, u realise there is someone with u in that sadness, the sadness starts decreasing and in sometime, it just vanishes.. same way u cant be happy alone, coz when u r happy, u need it to share with others... remember, if u r happy alone, then there is always someone who is unhappy coz of the same reason as of ur happiness.. and happiness on a stake of making someone unhappy isnt worth it and it fades away very soon..

so share the happiness, and believe me, the best feeling is to making someone smile.. if u can make a sad person smile, u would feel a undefinable happiness.. a true happiness.. which will bring smile on 2 faces rather than 1...

There are times, when u r sad, but u know, coz of ur sadness, someone else will also be sad, in that times, try and fake a smile, dont let the smile on other person's face fade.. and if u r able to make someone happy even being urself sad, then thats the time, u deserve happiness... and those who deserve anything.. they get it, sooner or later.. at times, u will need patience but trust me its worth waiting..

a poem from me...

A HOPE OF JOY

Life is like a chamber

Full of joy with every member.

Filled with love and sorrow,

There’s always coming is a “tomorrow”

Love, Passion and Devotion,

Keeps your life in motion

Life shouldn’t be miserable,

Try to keep it calm and stable,

Removing all fear from my mind

I am a person, trying to be kind.

Peace is what we need,

But All about fight is what we nowadays read,

Basics of life, we always forget,

In return, hardship is all what we get.

if we remember the basics of life to keep each other happy, we as well will be happy... u cant attain happiness with fight.. so peace is a basic MANTRA of happiness..

Keep Smiling...

a poem on life from my friend rohit

thnx rohit for this lovely poem:

life to me is life to u

sometimes shines like a shining shoe , sometimes fades like the sun in the blue

life is a struggle , life is a race

sometimes straight , sometimes maze

percieve n deal with life as it comes,

inherent the goodness , ignore the humps

life to me is an experience so pleasent

cant be compared to neither sky nor cresent

life is something we get only 1

so let us enjoy celebrate n have fun

sadness

well, dont think about me as a pessimistic, i m not, and i am not a sad person as well, i thought to write happiness before sadness but i feel if u cant understand sadness, u cant understand happiness and vice-versa, but it would be better if i write it this way.. we dont want to go from light to darkness but from darkness to light, that's what i m relying on..

So again, what's sadness? think before proceeding ahead, i believe if someone asks u a question, u try to find a particular answer but when asked a question, ur mind gives an instant reply which u usually ignore, u dont want to take that as an answer.. but concentrate on it.. its the best reply of anything which u could think.. its in purest form..

next question.. what brings sadness to u.. what makes u real sad.. i knw, first thing that comes in mind is if i dont get what i want makes me sad, but dont u think, its a real diplomatic and very common answer.. well its a real hard question.. atleast i find it tuff..

sadness is one thing, which plays one of the most important factor in changing life, changing mentality and many other things.. if a guy is happy, he wont change the way he is living, either be it right or be it wrong... but when someone is sad, he takes new decision, tries to find way out of sadness and thus changes his thinking and changes his life...

if one doesnt knows what sadness is, he wouldnt ever realise what happiness is..

sadness for everyone is different.. i m sad, when my loved ones are sad or when someone close has hurted me.. just experienced 2 days back, even when i hurt someone close...

shit, that experience has screwed me big tym, i have hurted that anonymous girl i mentioned in about me.. and it was tough to get over it.. i am not yet over it and neither is she..

Usually when we face sadness, we say y does god has to give me tough times, and y not others? but the fact is everyone is sad, no one can remain happy thruout the life, everyone fails sometime or other..

rightly said by someone.. the person who has never failed in life has never tried anything new....

this is one of my poems, its probably one of the most pessimist poem u would have gone thru..

LIFE OR PAIN...

I wish I was never born,

I wish, I never faced this storm.

Y the life has to be so cruel.

Y I am not the one to rule.

Y does it takes the test, when I don’t want it..

Y it has to give me pain at every bit

Life is like, to me a bane

Always sadness and pain..

I am not happy with this life,

I want death to be my wife..

I wish I could die soon,

U may laugh at it, but it’s a boon..

I want to sleep in the arm of death

Coz am tired of taking this deadly breath

i guess this is how everyone feels when they are sad, u know, i have realised people are usually sad when they feel that they dont have anyone with them, when they feel they are alone and they have a fight, which the have to win alone... but trust me that's not the fact, somewhere or the other, there is someone who will be there by you, u just have to understand who that is.. and once u have pin pointed that person, once u realise, u r not alone, sadness fades away slowly.. try it.. it works.. it works for me everytime, and usually whom i find next to me is that anonymous girl or at times, couple of other close friends..

a line from me: u enjoy ur happiness and cry when u r sad, but remember one thing, nothing lasts forever... happiness and sadness come by turns, they each have lessons one need to learn.

so dont be too happy nor be too sad, work on it, and try to find the positive side of things and this sadness would fade away..

what's life

this is a real simple question, i dont know, if i have any readers or not.. but if any, i would like u to think about this question in ur mind and answer urself before u proceed ahead.. and ya there isn't any answer to this question which is wrong, its true whatever might be the answer in ur mind..

i have thought about this question many times, and whenever i think, there are another 1000s of questions which comes in my mind, why was i even born? who created me and why? what am i doing in this world? what are you guys doing here? why is this blog here? why do we die? what's the truth? what's the lie? how does truth and lie matters? and many..

i dont know who created me, have heard, god is the creator, i thank him to create me, but i m not sure, if i mean that thanks.. i mean, y should anyone thank him or whoever may be the creator?

i thanked him, coz my parents and elders have told me to respect ur elders and ur creators.. i guess thats the probably only reason i thanked him.. and now y i shouldnt thank is coz, i dont have answers to all of my questions.. i dont know, what i m doing here and why? the creator should have given me a goal to achieve when he send me.. for eg. whenever we do anything, it has a goal, no matter if u reach or not, the goal is still there what u r working for.. eg. i m writing this blog, to get out things which are in my mind.. the things which gets me restless... u r reading it for a reason as well.. and that reason is ur goal..

i have heard many saints saying that god has created u to become what he wants u to become, but i dont know, what he wants me to become. i dont know, if he wants me to preach to other people or to work thruout the day and earn, eat and sleep, or anything else.. so no goals set, i know someday i would die, i know the destiny.. well, to be frank, i laugh when i think about it..

think, what if u r playing ur favorite game, and u know that u will win in the end, i mean 100% surety of a win, y would u put in any efforts when u know the result.. or y would u work hard, if u know, anyways u gonna complete what u r doing? we wont work hard, if we know, the result.. and lets face the fact its true.. everyone wants to have a happy life and whats being happier than to do anything u like and not just working hard to achieve something.... and well, the creator showed us the destiny, we all are going to die someday.. so y should i even try surviving? whats the vague point in it? why should i take all the pain, when what i want is happiness? and when i know, whatever i do, however hard i work, i will just spend my time and someday what happens is i take my last breath and sleep, sleep for ever.. all's gone, why would i work anyways.. ya some people say, if u work hard and do nice things, u will be remembered after ur death, but then again a question how many of them have been remembered till yet, anyways thats a small point, the big point is if that makes me happy, well if i consider myself, i dont like working hard but i love helping others. i have tried all possible things to be a nice guy but have faced thousands of problems, i try to do good to someone, if it goes good, then i m good, if it doesnt work out properly, i m worse than the guy who didnt even try to do anything about it...

so basically life is nothing but its an experience.. for someday its good, for some its bad, happiness and sadness comes in turns.. dont let the happiness take over ur mind, nor sadness let ur soul burn.. remember 1 thing, no matter if u r happy or sad, time would change and u would face the other 1 very soon.. dont work hard, or for that that matter dont do anything.. but do everything which makes u feel good, makes u happy, dont let things like money matter u much, i mean they are important but then if u have accomplished things like money and respect in all the years spend, but when u sit alone, looking behind, you would see, u have lost so many years for things which are not the exact things which makes u happy, nor do they give u the real happy memories when u r alone,..

being alone is one thing, which u always wanted.. and always want,. so sit alone, forget the world and then decide, what u want to do.. but ya keep in mind, be practical as well to some extent.. things which u want should also not get to the point where u have no food to eat, nothing to survive by.. life is not as bad as we see, nor as good as we think.. so take care of everything u do.. try to enjoy it as much as possible.. but always remember the ugly truth is death so dont harm anyone, dont do things which u dont like, just for sake of doing it.. ..

i have read this line somewhere.. i just love it.. might be useful for u too..

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”- anonymous

more to be written.. many many things..

About me

Hey folks, i m not very good at english, so bare with me at times, i wont find the correct word to explain myself.. well talking about me today, I am Abhishesh, a just turned 21 years old guy from somewhere.... ya i havent mentioned my location, coz i m not sure, if i was given a choice to be at this place, i love this place but thne everyone loves their own place ryt? anyways, havent been to many places in my life but i want to be lost someday... where noone would be there to find me.. to be with me, to show me what the fun is, show me what the sadness is.. give me love... or to hate me...

i want to get over with these things.. well u might think, i m just an usual youngster, maybe u r ryt but then i wasnt the same before.. i m not sure what changed me.. but have changed..

now saying about me, i want to be lost someday i said, but then i m emotionally attached with few people, i want to assure, they have a wonderful life, even when i m gone, that includes, my parents, my sis and an anonymous girl..

i love all of them, parents taught me to walk, to eat, to read, to write, etc etc.. i really cant write all of it, i mean no one can write what their parents have taught them... my sis.. she is a lovely kid, ya she is smaller to me, i love her a lot, being my only sibling, i care for her way too much, very possessive as well. this possessiveness someday plays a bad role, when i see that she is doing something and when i try to explain, she wont listen and that upsets me a lot, but i cant stop saying her.. i have seen some part of life and she hasnt seen any..

about the anonymous gal, she is the gal who holds equal importance in my life as my family, have been with this gal now since past 3 years, she has a major contribution in making me independent.. she taught me to smile... the one thing which i may have never learnt if she wasnt there, it isnt that my family dint keep me happy but then its under a bindation, other things apart my family was sick, i was a real narrow minded person, she opened the gates of my thoughts and i can feel the difference.. she taught me to express my views without any fear and without any care of what people might think about it.. she gave me that confidence which i always lacked in me...